The Light Bulb: A confession and a list

Saturday, November 03, 2007

A confession and a list

Here's a confession, dear reader.

Back in April, the Light Bulb household got TiVo. (That's not the confession.) It is both wonderful and awful at the same time. Wonderful because it lets you search and digitally record television shows via an intuitive interface based on your own preferences. Awful because it enables you to record lots of television to watch at some point in the future, potentially filling up any available free time you might have.

Now this technology has allowed the Light Bulb family to do a much better job of recording our favorite programs when we're not around. For Mrs. Light Bulb, one of these programs is (sigh) One Life to Live. Shortly after TiVo arrived at the Light Bulb house, I was asked to set up a "Season Pass" for One Life to Live. This is a feature that enables you to record any and every episode of a certain program whenever it appears. Therefore, an episode of One Life to Live gets recorded by the TiVo almost every weekday for our later viewing pleasure, usually that evening. Notice I said "our". Yes, dear readers, I have become hooked. On a soap opera.

Perhaps it's the morbid curiosity of seeing characters go through situations that could never possibly happen in real life that draws me in. Whatever it is, I'm not proud of it. Nevertheless, there are high points, and here is one of them. Along the lines of Timothy McSweeney's Internet Tendency Lists, I have compiled a list (sure to grow) which I hope you will enjoy. To wit...

Lines I Have Heard Characters Say on the Soap Opera One Life to Live Which I Would Truly Never, Ever Expect to Hear from Any of My Friends or Family in Real Life, EVER

Back when my dad was on death row...

Mom, did you send dad back to jail, again?

There's only room for one selfish jerk in this relationship, baby, and that's me.

How many broken marriages to the same man do you need to have before you realize the two of you don't work?

Thank you. That is all.

2 comments:

1anonymousmom said...: And has Mrs. Lightbulb gotten hooked on The History Channel, or anything Mr. Lightbulbesque?; 8:45 AM
Mr. Light Bulb said...: I feel certain you know the answer to that one. :-); 7:10 PM

Post a Comment

FAVORITE QUOTES

The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do.
Thomas Jefferson

Every immigrant makes America more American. You can't become an Englishman by going to live in England, or a Frenchman by going to live in France, but anyone can become an American.
Ronald Reagan

Our destruction, should it come at all, will be from another quarter. From the inattention of the people to the concerns of their government.
Daniel Webster

While capitalism and socialism exist side by side, they cannot live in peace. One or the other will triumph — a funeral dirge will be sung over the Soviet Republic or over world capitalism.
Lenin, On Peaceful Coexistence, 1920

The family, however, has to be a sacred unity believing in the permanence of what it teaches, if its ritual and ceremony are to express and transmit the wonder of the moral law, which it alone is capable of transmitting and which makes it special in a world devoted to the humanly, all too humanly, useful. When that belief disappears, as it has, the family has, at best, a transitory togetherness.
Allan Bloom, The Closing of the American Mind, page 57, 1987

It is a paradoxical truth that tax rates are too high and tax revenues are too low and the soundest way to raise the revenues in the long run is to cut the rates now ... Cutting taxes now is not to incur a budget deficit, but to achieve the more prosperous, expanding economy which can bring a budget surplus.
John F. Kennedy

We live in an age of science and of abounding accumulation of material things. These did not create our Declaration. Our Declaration created them. The things of the spirit come first. Unless we cling to that, all our national prosperity, overwhelming though it may appear, will turn to a barren sceptre in our grasp. If we are to maintain the great heritage which has been bequeathed to us, we must be like-minded as the fathers who created it. We must not sink into a pagan materialism. We must cultivate the reverence they had for the things that are holy.
Calvin Coolidge

The issue as regards judicial activism is not whether there shall be "change” since no one is against generic "change" but who shall wield the enormous power of prescribing the particular nature and direction of change and by whose authorization? More specifically, shall it be done openly by officials assigned this task by the Constitution and responsible to the voters, or shall it be done furtively by unelected judges using verbal sleight-of-hand to attribute to the Constitution things that the Constitution never said? The issue is preemption of power, not "change."
Thomas Sowell, The Vision of the Anointed, page 230, 1995

America, is like a healthy body and its resistance is threefold: its patriotism, its morality, and its spiritual life. If we can undermine these three areas, America will collapse from within.
Joseph Stalin

Of all the dispositions and habits which lead to political prosperity, Religion and morality are indispensable supports. In vain would that man claim the tribute of Patriotism, who should labor to subvert these great Pillars of human happiness, these firmest props of the duties of Men and citizens.
George Washington, Farewell Address

FAIR USE

This site may contain copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. I make such material available in my efforts to advance understanding of political, human rights, economic, democracy, and social justice issues, etc. I believe this constitutes a "fair use" of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for research, educational, or satirical purposes. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go beyond "fair use", you must obtain permission from the copyright owner.

FOR THE LAWYERS

Mr. Light Bulb produces this blog as a citizen, exercising his Constitutional right to free political speech. The opinions expressed by Mr. Light Bulb and those providing comments are theirs alone and do not reflect the opinions of Google or any employee thereof. Google is not responsible for the accuracy of any of the information provided on The Light Bulb.

DISCLAIMER: Please read all instructions and warnings before use. Must be 18 years of age or older to proceed further. Enter at your own risk. Hostess will seat you. Trucks over 4 tons excluded. Void where prohibited by law. Some assembly required. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. Do not play with matches. We make no other warranties, expressed or implied. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. This is not an attorney advertisement or referal service. No user-serviceable parts inside. Website contains small parts and is not intended for use by children under the age of eighteen. Void where prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted. Caveat emptor. Provided "as-is" without warranty. Reader assumes full responsibility. We are an equal opportunity employer. No shoes, no shirt, no service. Quantities are limited while supplies last. Read at your own risk. No animals were harmed in the preparation of this web site; only humans. This web page contains no CFCs. Discontinue use if nausea or dizziness occurs. Use only in a well-ventilated area. Keep away from fire or flames. No soliciting. Action figures sold separately. No preservatives added. Some equipment shown is optional. Price does not include tax. Do not remove any HTML tags under penalty of law. Your mileage may vary. All rights reserved. . Smoking could be hazardous to your health. Cigarette Smoke Contains Carbon Monoxide. Smoking Causes Lung Cancer, Heart Disease, Emphysema. Actual cash value of this website is 1/1000th of a cent. Listen to your mom. Eat your veggies. Wear your seatbelt. Don't take candy from strangers... or strange people... or anyone really. Terms are subject to change without notice. All decisions are final! This supersedes all previous notices.

Disclaimer does not cover misuse, accident, lightning, flood, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, hurricanes, or other acts of God, neglect, damage from improper use, incorrect line voltage, unauthorized use, unauthorized repair, improper installation, typos, broken antenna or marred cabinet, missing or altered serial numbers, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, sonic boom vibrations, customer adjustments that are not covered in this list, and incidents owing to an airplane crash, ship sinking or taking on water, motor vehicle crashing, dropping the item, falling rocks, leaky roof, broken glass, disk failure, accidental file deletions, mud slides, forest fire, hitting of a deer, milk coming out of your nose due to laughing while drinking, or projectiles, which can include, but are not limited to, arrows, bullet shots, BBs, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, emissions of X-rays, Alpha, Beta and Gamma rays, knives, stones, etc.

The Light Bulb

Saturday, November 03, 2007

A confession and a list

2 comments:

ABOUT ME

ARCHIVE

LABELS

MY BLOGOSPHERE

NEWS

FAVORITE QUOTES

GREAT BOOKS

COUNTERS

IMPORTANT STUFF

FAIR USE

FOR THE LAWYERS